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Our friends for over two decades, who has faced and conquered many hardships, and I respect her for that. But, she has been often caught off guard by others. Her partner ended their marriage, and it was a massive blow. Several of her friends disappeared during that time, as they were only interested in her husband. She was stunned by her. She put in increased attention toward our bond, and must have realised better what friendship was.

A Recurring Theme In Relationships

Over the years, quite a few close to her have drifted apart without her being certain of the reason. The company she worked for turned on her, even though she was very skilled at her work, she departed not understanding the reason for the change.

Present Situation

Recently, we've both stepped back from work so we're spending each other more, however, I feel the part I play in our friendship feels one-sided. I open discussion points but she shifts them to what interests her. Regarding political views, she holds strong opinions. I try to recommend factchecking or other angles.

She is arranging a holiday to a country I have traveled to on several occasions and lived in previously. I tried to provide personal experiences, yet it was unappreciated. She really solely sought me to confirm her decisions. I have come back from four weeks in that country she is eager to meet, but I don't.

Weighing the Options

I hesitate in this role that walks away abruptly, however, I feel she will ever grasp the effect of how she acts on my self-esteem. Right now, my state is distancing myself. What's the best step?

Ways Forward

You could cut and run, but it is not often the peaceful resolution that we desire. However, addressing it with a view to resolution takes courage and readiness on both your parts.

Experts suggest applying a practical approach to handling disagreements:

"The first step involves describing how things go during your discussions. It should be objective and clear and basically what a recording device would replay. Step two is to express how this leaves you feeling. This allows for no dispute on this point. Your feelings belong to you, of course. Finally involves requesting how the two of you going to change the dynamics in your relationship."

Keep in mind she too has her own side, meaning you must to be prepared to hear that. A helpful technique is telling her:

"It's your turn to speak and I promise to remain silent for 30 minutes."

It's wildly successful in fostering better communication.

Final Thoughts

She could ignore your concerns, since certain individuals cling to a self-protecting mindset: they maintain a version regarding their experiences they're unable to release since their identity relies on it and it's all they've known. This is difficult because there's no clear path with these people, mere obstacles. However, she might initially present defensively then consider about what you've said. And even if you don't achieve a fix, it provides closure knowing you were truthful.